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Apr 10 2025
I Didn’t Think Things Would Get This Chaotic When We Elected President Donkey Kong

“Right out of the gate, it’s been barrel, barrel, barrel, all day, every day. Some barrels even dip themselves in oil, combust, and then mosey around looking for trouble. Same with President Donkey Kong’s press conferences. Reporter asks a gotcha question? Barrel. Someone wants to know what he’s doing about the price of eggs? Barrel. Softball from a friendly reporter? Barrel, barrel, barrel.” (Yep, there’s a horse in the hospital.)

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